After 5 years of praying for another child and after mourning 5 precious babies who are in heaven, we are overjoyed to meet our second little miracle tomorrow morning!
We could never have walked this road without the Lord and all He has given us. We are so thankful for all the people He brought into our lives to pray for us, pray with us, pray over us, encourage us, support us, love on us, cry with us, challenge us, and now to celebrate with us...
Psalm 30: 5b, 11-12
"...Weeping may last through the night, but joy comes with the morning...
You have turned my mourning into joyful dancing.
You have taken away my clothes of mourning and clothed me with joy,
That I might sing praises to you and not be silent.
O Lord my God, I will give You thanks forever."
Wow, it has been a really long time since i posted anything. Life has been good, just very fast paced. We had our best friends living with us for the past month. They have moved along to their next destination and the nesting has begun for me!
I am now 30 weeks pregnant with this precious baby!
Hard to believe I am already this far! Today I finally filled out my hospital registration paperwork they try to get you to fill out at your first OB appt. I refused several times due to the fact I had a pretty sad collection of these over the years. I also would get those lovely reminder calls right before my baby was supposed to be due reminding me to get registered. I can vividly remember crying after each call I received. So today after hanging up with the registration lady, I sobbed. I am so overwhelmed that after 5 years of waiting, this is my reality. It is still so surreal to me. Thankful does not even begin to describe how I feel. I think more than anything I am in awe of God's mercy through it all. All along He knew I would get to enjoy pregnancy once again, enjoy preparing for another sweet child, and enjoy His gift of life. I am even more amazed He chose to heal me well before entrusting me with another life.
With all that said, I am truly enjoying being pregnant once again. I am getting a sense of this sweet baby's personality already. Kaylee was a very active baby in utero and little brother or sister is the same. I get reminder kicks every time I lay on my side that baby is being squished! I really have no other options of how to lay so I back off slightly each time I am reminded! There isn't a whole lot of room in there due to the fact I have a small torso. Whenever music is on, esp worship music at church I can feel a lot of activity! It is so fun! Some evenings when the baby is really active, I rock on my front porch to settle him/her down, so far it seems to work! Looks like I will have a spoiled rocked little baby!
It is amazing all the attention you get when your pregnant. I forgot what it was like. I will get friendly smiles every time I am in public. I have had several strangers come right up and tell me I am having a boy. So funny! No one has said girl yet. Kaylee is absolutely so excited to be a big sister. She kisses my belly all the time and tells me how much she will help with "her" baby!
Thanking God each and every day for His Goodness and Redemption! Thanks for all the prayers for this sweet child and my pregnancy! I will post some pictures soon.
I just wanted to share some of the details on how this miracle came to be. The most exciting part in my opinion is that this sweet child was a complete surprise! We were no where close to going down this road again by our own plans. Amazing how God works! Our December was a crazy month preparing for Mark's surgery and being filled with unwanted anxiety on how things would turn out. Guess I needed a lesson on trust! As January came, we both felt such a peace and relief that after 4 years of thyroid trouble, he would be free of that gland once and for all. The first 2 weeks of January were some of the most peaceful wehave had in years. Mark took 18 days off total between the holidays, surgery, and recovery. It was so nice to spend quality time as a family.
It wasn't far into January that I started having some pregnancy symptoms and thought, "Na, couldn't be." But after a few days of wondering, and after 6 previous pregnancies, I thought I may need to buy a test. I didn't tell anyone I was suspecting it or taking a test, not even Mark. So when I read the result, I was in shock. I fell to my knees and cried out to God. I tried to call Mark and could not get through for an hour and a half. Honestly I felt that was from the Lord since He knew I needed to spend some time with just Him. After telling Mark I called a dear friend to take Kaylee for the afternoon so I could process this huge shock.
I don't even know how to explain the last several months in just a few sentences. All I can say is the Lord has been my fortress, more than ever before. I had to trust in His purpose for this pregnancy and remind myself His truths through reading scripture and spending alone time with Him every day. I have never felt more dependent on Him than I have recently and I am certain there has been nothing better to humble me. Overall it has been more peaceful then the last 4 pregnancies. The joy we have felt is unexplainable. There is simply nothing the medical world or I myself have done to keep this precious child alive inside me. God is fully responsible for this miracle! So I am now 16 weeks along and falling so in love with this sweet baby. To my complete surprise, I have felt this baby's sweet kicks for a few weeks now and it is truly amazing! Kaylee is so excited to be a big sister! We are so excited to welcome a new baby!And this is just the beginning....
"For this child I have prayed, and the Lord has granted me my petition which I asked of him."
After 5 years of praying for a sweet child, God has blessed us with this new life. We are beyond words and so amazed at His goodness!
Psalms 30: 11-12 "You have turned my mourning into dancing; you have loosed my sackcloth and clothed me with gladness, that my glory may sing your praise and not be silent. O Lord my God, I will give thanks to you forever!"
We are thankful for all who have been burdened with prayers for our sake! He hears them! May God get the glory for this Miracle!!
It has been so long since I have blogged! Not really sure why? Our 2011 has been an interesting year to say the least. God brought us through a whole new world of challenges and blessings!
*For starters we sold the only home our family has had together and moved to a new area for the wonderful neighborhood and schools... *GI issues for me that after 3 months ended with surgery to remove my Gall Bladder *After months of misdiagnosed illness, my Mother-in-law was diagnosed with Lymphoma, what a journey that road has been, we are Praising God that after chemo there is no sign of the Lymphoma any more!!! We saw how family can come together and form a bond we didn't know existed until pushed to the limits. *My sister had her precious baby girl Lacey that we all adore to pieces!! *We have experienced nightly wake-ups from our 6 year old that after trying everything we can think of will still NOT end which has led to a grouchy mommy, Kaylee, and daddy on numerous occasions *Got to experience the magic of Disney World through the eyes of my precious little girl! *Mark underwent a total thyroidectomy after years of problems
So many life changing events took place in one short year. I kinda felt whip-lashed as we came into a new year. Running at full speed was no doubt exhausting. As soon as Mark recovered from his surgery, we both felt such a peace and calmness come over us as we started a new year.
In light of all the past year has brought us I am reminded by humility that I am not the Planner here. I would have forgone "lots" of what happened this past year...it wasn't in my hopes and dreams of "2011". I was reading James 4 recently and was extremely humbled by what it said... Warning about self confidence 13 Look here you who say, "Today or tomorrow we are going to a certain town and will stay there a year. We will do business there and make a profit." 14 How do you know what your life will be like tomorrow? Your life is like the morning fog-it's here a little while, then it's gone. 15 What you ought to say is, "If the Lord wants us to, we will live and do this or that." 16 Otherwise you are boasting about your own plans, and all such boasting is evil.
Wow, how often do I plan my future with no regard to God? Especially when it came to having children? I planned exactly how many kids I wanted and I did not hold onto those plans loosely. How much harder was this journey for me because of the crushing pain of my plans being thwarted? I am thankful to share that I have been forgiven of this "boasting." I know that it is good to plan ahead and to make goals, even when it comes to family size, but simply adding "If God wills it" to the beginning of each goal is more wise in the end.
I can say with confidence that I am thankful that He is my planner...After all He knows all the details and brings on so many more blessings than I would be able to plan-up on my own!