Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Right now

It has been some time since I have regularly updated my blog. Time passes so quickly and I am reminding myself to cherish the "right now." Just watching my baby girl grow and learn reminds me how fast they grow up. I have compiled a journal just for her one day to read. It is filled with all the funny things she has said, all the fun things we have done, as well as my thoughts on how much fun raising her has been. It is something I pray she will treasure one day.

I am also in the midst of cherishing my time with Mark. He has had many health issues over the last several years. I feel we are at some sort of specialist each month. I am reminded to enjoy our life "right now" and not look ahead so much. It is so easy to look ahead and want. But when I truly sit down with the Lord and spend time thanking Him, I am brought to my knees by His goodness. He has blessed me in ways I never imagined. We are just days away from a trip to Hawaii that Mark in his hard work earned for us. Which reminds me how thankful I am for a job that blesses us so richly. I am thankful for both of our wonderful parents who have willingly agreed to care for Kaylee so we can get away.

I am thankful for how God has revealed Himself to us as of late. I have watched as He has opened many doors in our lives to be His voice and share what He is about with other people. He has used Mark in such amazing ways lately that it truly has left us in awe. I am so enjoying where God has placed us "right now."

It's hard to believe it has only been 4 months since I lost our latest baby. The grieving process this time was so much different. There was no time of numbness. I am certain I am not through this process yet, but this time I am not suffocating in the pain like I was in the past. For the first time in a long time, I am content with our small family God has given us. It has been so peaceful to rest in that.

Our counseling continues to be so encouraging. We both so enjoy it, as crazy as that sounds. It is really helping us make boundries and not second guessing our decisions. Having a sounding board to bounce our thoughts onto has been so helpful.

I am learning what it means to enjoy the "right now" and it is good. I am confident God will have much more to teach me throughout my journey, but for now I am enjoying where He has placed me and who He has placed me with...
I will post a few pictures from our time away when we return, God Bless.

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