My latest

So for 5 months now I have been dealing with a very unpleasant organ...my gall bladder. Starting around Thanksgiving time I would notice each day I felt nausea come and go. Then I noticed the bloating, painful gas, and belching. On Christmas Eve I was admitted to the hospital for a violent stomach "virus" which later we discovered was most likely a gall bladder attack. After my hospitalization I was noticing each evening I was nauseated after dinner. So I started asking my Doc friends who agreed it was gall bladder trouble. I began a 5 week long journey of a no-fat -low-fat diet. There were days I ate vegetables and chicken broth and felt as if I ate funnel cakes and elephant ears at the fair! After a Dr. visit and a surgeon appointment, I was told the testing would take a few weeks. So in the meantime I decided to try a gall bladder flush to try and salvage this God given organ!

Well, the flush took a lot out of me, both figuratively and literally! I did it on Valentine's night since Mark had a church meeting :( I ended up disoriented in the middle of the night and apparently tried to find my way back to bed after the 38th visit to the toilet that night and leaped onto what I thought was my bed! I landed quite awkwardly onto our space heater and rested there until Mark jumped out of bed to see what happened. I mumbled in a drunken like manner that I was fine just lying there for a while. I was extremely nauseated and was content to snuggle our heater for the time being. Once Mark peeled me up onto the bed we discovered in the "crash" I had gouged my knee open and was bleeding. He got me some phenergan (nausea meds) and put me back to bed for the night. In the morning I wasn't doing much better so he took me to the ER where they gave me some IV nausea meds and fluids.

The next day I had a Hida scan where they inject you with radioactive dye to test the function of the Gall bladder under radiographic images. The results showed I had 8% function left in my GB and needed it out. I just scheduled surgery for March 8th and am incredibly excited to eat fats again. My diet is so limited and I usually have to make separate meals for my family which is not so fun when you are craving every inch of fattening foods! So I have 11 days left until I get my gall bladder out and I am counting down the days!

I have caught myself really grumbling and complaining about all of this; the nausea, the diet, the inconvenience, the medical bills. I was convicted lately that this is really nothing compared to what the rest of the world suffers in hunger, disease, and all sorts of other "discomforts."
Who am I to complain of a modified diet, GI symptoms, and inconvenience. I have lived through far worse events and have seen God's hand lift me from the mire on more than one occasion. So I am patiently waiting for this journey to come to a halt so I can enjoy dates with Mark, friends over for dinner, and a variety of fattening foods once again!

Creative

It has been FOREVER since I have posted on here. We are in a new mode of life right now...attempting to sell our house! It has been a lot of work and I am finally at a place in my life where I am ready and willing to do it! We are prayerful that we may be able to sell the house and find another in time for Kindergarten next fall...but if not I am trying to figure out an back up plan.

Time seems to go so fast when you have young children. Kaylee continues to keep me busy as a bee and as she gets older I am discovering a whole new side of parenting! Which is both fun and challenging. We have been spending our afternoons reading, playing games, having tea party's, and having play dates. Usually she wakes up every morning asking "who do I get to play with today." And usually if I say "me" she gives me a sour face. But all in all we have been having tons of fun!

Some of my challenges as a mom have taken a different turn. For instance, Kaylee has been fighting me every morning on what she will wear to school and I have been struggling to get her to eat breakfast....So, I could either continue a crying screaming battle each morning OR turn it into a game. So I told her we are going to have each day represent a color and we both have to wear that color, eat that color, and read books with that color. It was an instant hit. Kay got busy to work writing each color out on a piece of paper and ordering a day for it. Then she got into her closet and found an outfit for each day to match that color. Mornings have begun happier and with (virtually) no arguments and we are having tons of fun doing it too!

Lately

It has been so long since I've written a post...not really sure why. We have been busy fixing up our home to sell this January. It has taken a little longer than we thought. Just thinking about selling our home brings a bittersweet taste....this is the place where we started our lives together, had a child, and walked through adversity together. There are so many memories in this home. I am reminded what a blessing a home can be to a family. Our main reason for moving on is for school districts for kindergarten next Fall. Hard to believe my little girl is getting so big.

Life for us has been so peaceful. There is not a day that goes by that I am not reminded of God's grace and love for me. It brings tears to my eyes daily to remember where he has brought me from.
This Christmas time is so very different than the last three. Christmas is my favorite time of year and this year has been so much fun. Kaylee is really starting to understand what it is all about.
While at the post office last week she befriended an older man in the long line with her charm and funny disposition. His full attention was toward her and she knew it. So she started asking him if he knew God and Jesus? My heart sunk immediately as I was nervous for him to get scared away. When he said he knew them a little bit she proceeded to ask him if he knew what Jesus did for him? He said no. So she told him Jesus died on the cross for his sins and that He loves him very much. Then she just wouldn't let him off the hook...next was "do you go to church?" He sheepishly said no and she put her hands on her hip and said "why not?" This is where I started freaking out. I gently said "lets not grill the man". But he was not afraid of this little girl and was not scared away either. It really was a sweet conversation and I will never forget hearing my 5 year old witness to a stranger. The funny thing is I would never have done what she did, for obvious reasons. But the innocence and love from this little girl flowed out that day and I am pretty sure she blessed the man who held her attention the short 10 minutes we were in the post office that day.
This is what Christmas is about, not being afraid to focus on the reason it ever began. At church last night we talked about the first few verses from the book of John, how God created Jesus in the beginning, He always existed, not just the first Christmas, but from the beginning of creation. God's plan all along was to bring His only Son into the world as flesh to take our place.
John 1:1-4 "In the beginning was the Word (Jesus), and the Word(Jesus) was with God, and the Word(Jesus) was God. ² He was with God in the beginning. ³ Through him all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made. ⁴ In him was life, and that life was the light of all mankind."
Merry Christmas!

Redemption

Yesterday was my testimony. Thank you for all the prayers, love, encouragement, and support.
It went so well. I came home from MOPS and fell to the couch. I had no idea how much energy it took out of me. I was so exhausted. For weeks I have been preparing my heart to share what God wanted me to share. I wasn't sure how it was going to look or how it would be perceived. It felt so good to be real and share about the Healing that God worked through my story. As soon as I stood before the room full of women I felt all my fears fall by the waist side and felt a strength from the Lord overcome me.

2 Chronicles 16:9 "The eyes of the Lord search the whole earth in order to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him. "

Today we wrapped up our 1 Samuel study. We have been studying David and his heart for God. He was no where close to perfect and though he was called "A man after God's own heart." David walked in the truth and did not turn form the Lord even in his darkest hours. In the video Kay explains, "When you walk in truth it does not mean you will not encounter difficulty or that your faith will not be challenged or that everything is going to go your way. But, you can know that a sovereign God sits on His throne and He sees your heart and He sees your obedience and He is going to show Himself strong on your behalf. God will work the difficulties together for our good and His Glory."


I have no doubt seen the goodness of the Lord shine through my life, through tragedy and through redemption...

Psalm 27:13-14 "I am still confident of this, I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living, wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord."

Fall Family pictures

Prayers

So I am asking for prayers for this next month at MOPS. (Mother's of Preschoolers) Each month at MOPS we have different speakers come and share their knowledge, fun, or testimonies. The month of November I was asked to share my testimony. I am both honored and scared to death by this! Honored that the women in my group would be touched by God's story in my life and scared by oh so many things.

It was just last year I got in front of my church and spoke a small piece of what Mark and I had endured through our losses. At the time I was pregnant with our 6th baby. That was a whirlwind.
This time is so much different. I will be speaking for a lot longer and to a room full of mother's. I have an additional loss under my belt this year and so much has changed in my life.

The timing of this feels right and I feel God has given me an amazing story of His work in my life. The part that is difficult for me is getting up in front of people and doing a good job giving God the glory for my story. It is so easy for me to ramble about each and every little thing I have gone through. But I really want this to be an opportunity to be a blessing to any one out there who is suffering from loss, depression, anxiety, etc.

So this is where I need prayer...and also for time for me to get away alone with God and meditate on what it is God wants me to share and how.

Thank you ahead of time! Also, my testimony will be recorded and I will post the link here on my blog when it is available.

our little girl

We have had so much fun the last few weeks...Kaylee turned 5 and we really celebrated her this year! We all 3 went to Minneapolis for a wedding and took Kay to the "American Girl" store where we had a tea party. Then we had a Princess Tea Party with all her little princess friends.
This is the first year she really got into her birthday and understood it.

For me this celebrating was so sweet. It has always been really hard for me to watch this little girl grow older...I guess since we don't know if we"ll ever get to experience other children it is especially hard to watch it pass. But this year was different for me. I felt so free to celebrate this little girl, this life that God has given us to care for, to teach, to learn all about him. And I have been given a new freedom to enjoy her growing older. She has truly become a delightful little girl. So intuitive and curious about the world around her! So ready to learn new things.

We have certainly been blessed beyond compare in the life of this child!